Staying warm during the cold season

  The fall is slowly coming to an end, although these feelings did not fade. Every year is like the one before, I jealously observe the actions of those that are around you. The weather makes me feel unpleasant, the smell of winter makes me worried, making me fear the season I love the most.
  As snow falls the feelings start to burn, keeping me warm and safe, making me push away the things I love. Pushing you away..
  How can one guy stop this fading, is it not possible to find the cure for all of this...
I'm tired of the same story every year, the same problems that I can't overcome. For once I want to feel something new, I want to see something that has not been seen, I want to be something I'm not.
  I want to be with you!

The sadness behind the sweet melody

The way you express yourself,
through suicidal songs,
brings a tear to my eye,
and tores out my heart.
You speak as you are ready to go,
wanting to leave us behind,
with our memories of your sadness and fake smiles.
The pain you've experienced,
it is like no other,
and you should know that you'll never be a bother.
Every time I try to help,
every time I try to be there,
I end up hurting you.
Can't even take your mind off of your troubles,
somehow I always manage to pop your safe bubble.
Instead of helping I ask you questions,
making you think of life and it's darkness,
I ask questions I should have never mentioned.
No help ever came from me,
slowly I caused more pain and harm than I ever prevented.

  Unaware I push you to your limits, not knowing that you are near the end. As I continue doing so you pretend as if everything is fine, trying to prove me wrong hoping I won't see through your white lies, but I suffer as much as you do therefore I know what you are going through, or at least I think I do. My selfishness doesn't let me help you, nor will I ever be able to. I always apologize but then I go back doing what I already did, harming you over and over.

Time after time your songs send a chill down my bones,
once again you're hurt,
once more I caused it.
The suicidal thoughts never leave your head,
leaving you wondering about your deathbed,
wanting all of this to end.
You've never killed anyone, that's what you said,
but you are slowly taking your life away,
turning yourself into clay,
slowly breaking.
What beauty, you are breathtaking.

The method of your lies

I counted the bodies, Lifeless and cold, I counted the heads, That you left confused. I saw through your lies, A method you always use, But this time you are wrong, And I'll see you fall apart. As the the world evolves, You think it revolves around you, But this time you are wrong, As you don't speak the truth. How can you say that you love, When you love only yourself, Now that you're all alone, You'll be left unknown. You believe in your lies, A method you always use, But this time you are wrong, And those who loved you are gone!

Your beauty behind my eyes

Every time you walk by,
I can feel the love coming from the melody of your steps.
Leaving a scent from the joy you spread,
I stand mesmerized.
All your words are kind,
the kind that can save the world.
Looking in the distance, free of worry,
I'm still hypnotized.
You glow as bright as the full moon,
your smile always makes me bloom.
It would be better if it wasn't just my imagination.